Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize
