i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
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