i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
i believe in u and ur pee
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Randomize
