She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
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I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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