Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
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