return my video game
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
