It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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