I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
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