ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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