Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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