im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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