Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
