We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
