her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
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She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
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How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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