I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
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