What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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