i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
