Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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