R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
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dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
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Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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