is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
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