Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
