You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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