did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
