White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Randomize
