I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
She made me pour olive oil on her.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Randomize