There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Randomize
