and you said cock pushups were impossible
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Randomize
