And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
you win again, gameday.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Randomize
