There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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