I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
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Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
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I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
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