What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
