wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
