It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
