i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
