i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
