The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
