By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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