my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
