HIV tests are more positive than that guy
She's 40ish and I couldn't wake her up with a stick of dynamite. My sheets are going to be covered in glitter lotion and smell like grape vodka and shattered dreams tomorrow.
Aren't divorce parties fun?
You and I have very different definitions of fun.
I look better un-naked...
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
should my penis look like a turkey
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize
