I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
