Whod you bang
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
