i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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