if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
