yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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