well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip πππ
Your skills amaze me
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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