Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize