Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I showed him my bush... on skype.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Randomize
