Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
