i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Boobs speak an international language.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
