He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
